110 Friday the 13th Jokes and Puns

Fri-die the 13th is indeed the most ill-fated day of the year. ‘Paraskevidekatroaphobia’ is the term used to define the fear attached to this very unlucky day.

Many countries across the world perceive the number 13 as unlucky due to the Knightmare attached to this gloomy day. Masses believe this day is so unfortunate that they withdraw from their regular schedules, like doing business, traveling, and going to the office.

Friday the 13th Jokes and Puns

‘Here are Jason Voohee’s killer Friday 13th jokes and puns’ perfect to lighten up anyone’s mood on a gloomy Friday 13th.’ We trust by the end of reading these hilarious jokes, all the fear surrounding Friday the 13th will have vanished.

1. Which pasta dish do Italian people eat on Friday the 13th?

Fettuccini Afraid-o.


2. Jason Voorhees loves eating beans; do you know his favorite bean?

A human bean.


3. What’s way worse than Friday the 13th?

Monday the whatever.


4. What will you say if Jason Voorhees starts chasing you?

Please, stop Jason me.


5. Killers eagerly look forward to which day of the month?

Fri-Die the 13th.


6. What will be the result if you cross Jason Voorhees with a box of breakfast cereals?

A cereal killer


7. Why is Fright Day the 13th is a great day to be cherished?

Because no one was struck by lightning on Thor’s Day the 12th!


8. What happens when Jason Voorhees tells a joke?

It kills


9. If a monster’s working week begins on a Moan Day, when does it end?

On a Fright day.


10. A set of twin witches chasing you on Friday 13th is worse than?

Being chased by Freddy Krueger because you never know witch is which.


11. Why did the skeleton not want to go to the Friday the 13th dance party?

He had no-body to go with.


12. The cops arrested a black cat on Friday the 13th;

they said she was a purr-patrator.


13. Why did the skeleton not go and see a scary movie with his friends on Friday the 13th?

He didn’t have the guts.


14. At the Friday 13th dance party, the black cat saw her rival fish and said?

“I have a bone to pick with you.”


15. What costumes do ghosts wear for a Friday the 13th dance party?

BOO jeans


16. The black cat wore her favorite dress for the costume party on Friday 13th;

she wore a purrr-ple gown.


17. Which key opens the door to a haunted house?

A spoo-key!


18. The black cat did all her laundry and hung them on a?

fe-line to dry.


19. When is it considered unlucky to see a black cat?

When you are a mouse.


20. The witches’ black cat fell off the broom while flying;

it was cat-astrophic.


21. What do you think a ghost keeps in its stable?



22. While trying a new magic spell, the witch crossed a black cat and an oak tree.

The result was a black and white cat-a-log’ue.


23. Where do ghosts go for rides on Friday the 13th?

They ride in elevators; it raises their spirits!


24. To break the stigma surrounding black cats being a bad omen,

the cat joined the red cross society and became a first aid kit-ten and started helping mankind.


25. What did the ghost eat on a special Friday 13th lunch?

He had some spook-eti.


26. ‘Kruegers a jolly good fellow, Voorhees a jolly good fellow’

is the most popular song among witches and spirits to sing on Friday the 13th.


27. Why could the mummy not go out on Friday the 13th?

Because he was all wound up.


28. A coven of witches lost their way, so they had to take a stranger’s help.

They asked him, “witch way to the Friday 13th dance party?”


29. Why was the black cat feeling grouchy on the 13th of Friday?

She was in a very bad meowd.


30. The coven leader threw a grand party on Friday the 13th.

“This is the way to party when you are witch and famous,” she announced.


31. What is a black cat’s favorite game?

Hide and shriek!


32. What is Jason Voorhees’ favorite fast food restaurant?

Chi Chi Chi Chick-Fil-A.


33. Why was the black cat given the musical gig for the Friday 13th dance party?

Because she was very meow-sical.


34. What’s the best advice for Friday the 13th?’

For those who believe Friday the 13th is unlucky, pretend it’s any other day like in the last two years.


35. How was the black cat feeling on Friday the 13th?

Purr-fectly happy.


36. On Friday the 13th, I dreamt that a horse in armor was chasing me.

It was a Knightmare.


37. Why do people believe that black cats always get their way with people?

They say that the cat uses friendly purr-suation for manipulation.


38. What’s the scariest thing to do on Friday the 13th?

Check your bank account.


39. What will you call it when you are terrified on Friday the 13th, and all of a sudden, you witness an act of God in a mirror?

A mirror’cle.


40. Why can’t you kill humor on Friday the 13th?

Because it’s deadpan.


41. How do you distinguish between a black cat and a frog?

They say a black cat has nine lives, and the frog croaks every night.


42. What desserts do black cats have on Friday the 13th?



43. Knock knock!

Who’s there?

Ice cream!

Ice cream who?

Ice-cream, you scream, we all scream because it’s Friday Thirteenth.


44. What to do if your car breaks out on a rainy Friday the 13th night?

Walk to the nearby derelict summer camp and split up to look for landline.


45. Knock knock.

Who is there?


Voodoo who?

Voodoo you think you are, who gave you the right to ask me so many questions?


46. Where does Jason Voorhees buy shoes from?

Of course, Crocs.


47. Knock knock.

Who is there?


Bee who?

Bee-ware, the criminal is out. It’s Friday the Thirteenth!


48. What did the serial killer do after no kills on Friday the 13th?’

He committed suicide.


49. Knock knock.

Who is there?

Norma Lee

Norma Lee, who?

Normally, I won’t ask this, but witches the way to the haunted cemetery?

50. How did the neighbors console his wife?

By saying,” Hey look on the bright side. At least he died doing what he loved.”


51. Knock Knock!

Who’s there?


Yule who?

Yule know when you look out the door.


52. Which store you shouldn’t enter on Friday the 13th?

The ghost-ery store.


53. Do you know what Jason Voorhee’s favorite desert is?

It’s I-scream.


54. Cracking a serial killer joke on Friday the 13th is ok.

As long as they are properly executed.


55. What should you avoid on Friday the 13th?

Ladders, black cats and ridiculous superstitions.


56. What are the similarities between Bill Cosby and Freddy Krueger?

Once you fall asleep, you’re screwed.


57. Why was the killer relentlessly killing fat people on Friday the 13th?

He wanted to be a mass murderer.


58. What sort of parties do people generally organise on Friday the 13th?

Search parties


59. Mothers: The only people who will love you even when you are a machete-welding psychopath.

Mothers: The only person you are afraid of even when you are a machete welding psychopath.


60. Which country does Jason Voorhees love to spend time in?

Chi-chi-chi Na-na-na.


61. How can you tell difference between people and ghosts on Friday the 13th?

You can see right through the ghosts.


62. Who is targeting Anti-Vaxxers on Friday the 13th?



63. What’s the safest place to hide on Friday the 13th?


64. What do you do if your house is overrun with ghosts?

Hope that it’s Halloween and not Friday The 13th.


65. Why did the killer go on Friday the 13th on Primetime TV?

He wanted to e-stab-lish himself.


66. Did you hear about people being murdered and then having their bodies cooked?

Yes, it was a great heartwarming Friday the 13th story from start to finish.


67. Where do ghosts go for a family vacation after working on Friday the 13th?

Boo-dapest, the Boo-hamas, and Mali-boo.


68. How can Friday The 13th movie be wonderful?

If you watch it backward it is a beautiful story about a man resurrecting people with a machete.


69. Yo momma is so ugly,

even Freddy Krueger has nightmares.


70. As per a study, researchers found out that one person out of every group has the potential to be a murderer.

So I killed Steve on Friday the 13th just in case he tried to harm our group.


71. Number 13: I am the worst number in the world.

Number 666: That’s cute. Number 2020: Hold my beer…!


72. What game is most played on Friday the 13th?

Hide and Ghost Seek.


73. Who is the unluckiest girl on Friday the 13th?

Amber, constantly getting kidnapped.


74. Where can you find witches on Friday the 13th?

The scary-go-round


75. What do black cats like to have on the mornings of Friday the 13th?

Mice crispies


76. As per a report, 4000 people die from drowning in the US every year.

They should have been alive if they didn’t come near Lake Crystal.


77. What happens when you propose to someone blind on Friday the 13th?

They tell you that they are seeing someone else.


78. What makes Jason Voorhees different from Donald Trump?

Both are frightening individuals, but Jason understands how to hide behind a mask.


79. Dear Jedi, Today is Friday 13th,

there’s never been a better time to join the Dark Side


80. On Friday the 13th, which spa treatment should you avoid?

Eyes Cream


81. Why does Freddy Krueger wear a hat?

He ran out of scare spray


82. Which day of the month does everyone in the coven prefer?

Friday the 13th (A coven is 13 witches.)


83. Why don’t Americans worry about Friday the 13th?

After losing their home, job, and 401k nothing scares them anymore!


84. What happened after the stripper bar dancer was killed on Friday the 13th?

The place is now possessed by en-tities.


85. What do evil spirits sing on Friday the 13th?

‘Voorhees a jolly good fellow. Voorhees a jolly good fellow’


86. Why do people laud Jason Voorhees’s jokes?

Because they are killers.


87. What does a sorority girl do when she wakes up on Friday the 13th?

Nothing, she’s dead


88. What does Jason Voorhees sing on Friday the 13th?

Taking Care of Business


89. Why aren’t people afraid of Friday the 13th?

The lights are out, the windows are boarded up, the lawns aren’t cut. Everyday is Friday the 13th in America now


90. Friggatriskaidekaphobia is the scientific term for the fear of Friday the 13th.

Friga being the name of the Norse goddess for whom ‘Friday’ is named after.


91. How is Freddy Krueger like George W Bush?

They’re both famous for scaring the shit out of people!


92. There were 13 original colonies

Happy Friday the 13th everyone. May the odds be ever in your favour.


93. I’m going to celebrate Friday the 13th the same way I always do….

By murdering a bunch of teens by the lake.


94. According to Smithsonian Magazine fear of the # 13 costs American a billion dollars per year in?

Absenteeism, train and planecancellation, and reduced commerce on the 13th of the month.


95. Brad: It’s Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions?

Nathan: I think it’s unlucky to have superstitions


96. Fear of Friday dates back to Nordic Mythology. 

Many of their thirteen Gods met with violent death, such as Loki, the trickster.


97. Tupac Shakur died on?

Friday 13th in September of 1996.


98. Ancient Romans regarded the number 13 as a symbol of?

Death, destruction and misfortune.


99. In Spanish-speaking countries, instead of Friday, Tuesday the 13th(martes trece) is considered,

a day of bad luck.

100. 13 people, Christ, and his 12 disciples were in attendance at the last supper.

This is where the Christian belief ties in, making Friday a believed unlucky day, as the crucifixion occurred on a Friday.


101. Certain ocean liners will be held in dock until after midnight to appease passengers’

fears on Friday the 13th.


102. The Olsen twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley, were born on?

Friday the 13th (June 13, 1986)


103. British study concluded that even though there were fewer cars on the road on Friday the 13th (as compared with other Fridays),

more accidents were reported.


104. Hostels rarely have room number 13. Usually it is called 12a or 14. Same with floors of building and the elevator without a #13 button.

Highways sometimes will skip exit 13 altogether also


105. Because of increased disappearance reports,

the Empire state Building closes 4 hours early on Friday the 13ths.


106. Tylor Swift was born on Dec 13th, her lucky number 13,

she turned 1 on a Friday the 13th, and she turns 33 on Friday December 13, 2022


107. I had to cancel my dyslexic meeting tonight,

I never go out on Friday the 13th


108. Every month starting on a Sunday,

will have a Friday the 13th in it.


109. The worst thing about Friday the 13th

Is Monday the 16th


110. Two ladies are in a car, lady 1: Christmas is on Friday this year

Lady 2: I hope it’s not the 13th



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