The funniest jokes in the world could never go out of style. If your sense of humor tends to lean to the goofy side of things, don’t be ashamed. After all, funny topics make conversations better and more memorable.
We all love a good crowd-pleaser. Get to entertain your family and friends with hilarious jokes. Teachers too can use these jokes in the classroom setting to cheer up students in between tough subjects like physics or even maths e.t.c.
Funniest Jokes in the World in 2023
You might feel too mature for knock-knock jokes or silly puns in your teens or early twenties, but not in your 30s or when with kids. This kind of humor turns out to be hilarious again, and you feel the need to share them with your loved ones.
From the funniest jokes for adults to the smartest hard to crack jokes, we have something fun for everyone. Make sure you check out our list of winter jokes to keep you entertained during the cold season.
Let’s explore the following fun and hilarious funniest jokes in the world.
1. I said to the Gym instructor, “Can you teach me to do the splits?”
2. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. How did it go?
3. I’m on a whiskey diet. What have I lost?
4. What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common?
5. I was horrified when my wife told me that my six-year-old son wasn’t actually mine. Guess what?
6. What is the opposite of a croissant?
7. A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, ‘You should’ve been here at 8.30!’ Guess his reply?
8. My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.
9. If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
10. China has a population of a billion people. What does that imply?
11. Which branch of the military accepts toddlers?
12. Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins?
13. A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. What does the barman say?
14. Though I enjoy the sport, I could never date a tennis player. Do you know why?
15. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. Why was this happening?
16. I have a joke about time travel, but I’m not gonna share it.
17. I was in Tesco’s and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.
18. What’s the opposite of irony?
19. I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.
20. I was kidnapped by mimes once.
21. Got a PS5 for my little brother.
22. What do the movies Titanic and The Sixth Sense have in common?
23. I finally decided to sell my vacuum cleaner.
24. What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
25. When you die, what part of the body dies last?
26. I invented a new word!
27. A friend of mine went bald years ago, but still carries around an old comb.
28. Did you hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers?
29. You know there’s no official training for trash collectors?
30. Why do we tell actors to “break a leg?”
31. I’m thinking of a career where I estimate crowd sizes at different outdoor events.
32. Helvetica and Times New Roman walk into a bar.
33. What do you call a woman who sets fire to all her bills?
34. Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his Scrabble letters on the road.
35. Knock! Knock! Who’s there?
36. Did you hear how the zombie bodybuilder hurt his back?
37. I saw Usain Bolt sprinting around the track shouting, “Why did the chicken cross the road!?”
38. Heard about the new restaurant called Karma?
39. Where does the General keep his armies?
40. A woman in labor suddenly shouted, “Shouldn’t! Wouldn’t! Couldn’t! Didn’t! Can’t!”
41. How does a squid go into battle?
42. A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey and … cola.” “Why the big pause?” asks the bartender.
43. Where do you find a cow with no legs?
44. Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?
45. A bear walks into a restaurant. He tells his waiter, “I want a grilled…cheese.” The waiter says, “What’s with the pause?”
46. Did you hear about the claustrophobic astronaut?
47. What’s E.T. short for?
48. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
49. What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals?
50. Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes.
51. Why did the chicken go to the séance?
52. Two men meet on opposite sides of a river. One shouts to the other, “I need you to help me get to the other side!”
53. Where are average things manufactured? The satisfactory.
54. What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
55. How do you drown a hipster?
56. What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator door was opened?
57. What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
58. “I stand corrected!” Says who?
59. What does a nosy pepper do?
60. What did the left eye say to the right eye?
61. How does Moses make tea?
62. Why can’t you explain puns to kleptomaniacs?
63. Why is England the wettest country?
64. How do you keep a bagel from getting away?
65. What do you call it when Batman skips church?
66. What kind of exercise do lazy people do?
67. A guy goes to a pet store to buy a goldfish. The salesman asks him, “Do you want an aquarium?”
68. Why don’t Calculus majors throw house parties?
69. What do you call bears with no ears?
70. What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backward?
71. What’s a foot long and slippery?
72. What does Charles Dickens keep in his spice rack?
73. Exaggerations have become an epidemic.
74. What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
75. And God said to John, “Come forth and you shall be granted eternal life.”
76. Why should the number 288 never be mentioned?
77. I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did.
78. What did the Tin Man say when he got run over by a steamroller?
79. What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
80. What’s the difference between a golfer and a skydiver?
81. They all laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian.
82. What do you call a fake noodle?
83. Two cows are grazing in a field.
84. How do you make a tissue dance?
85. I told my physical therapist that I broke my arm in two places.
86. What did the 0 say to the 8?
87. What did the swordfish say to the marlin?
88. What do you call a pony with a cough?
89. How do you make holy water?
90. What did one hat say to the other?
91. Will glass coffins be a success?
92. I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger.
93. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?””
94. What do you call a magic dog?
95. What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
96. Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?
97. What’s orange and sounds like a carrot?
98. What do you call a bee that can’t make up its mind?
99. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?
100. Is it ignorance or apathy that’s destroying the world today?
101. What do you call the wife of a hippie?
102. What do you call a woman with one leg?
103. Where does Batman go to the bathroom?
104. What do dentists call their x-rays?
105. Did you hear about the first restaurant to open on the moon?
106. Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
107. What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
108. What do you get from a pampered cow?
109. Do you want to hear a construction joke?
110. Why is it annoying to eat next to basketball players?
111. Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
112. What breed of dog can jump higher than buildings?
113. How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
114. Why should you never trust stairs?
115. When does a joke become a ‘dad’ joke?
116. What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
117. Why did the M&M go to school?
118. How do you measure a snake?
119. Why do bees have sticky hair?
120. Where does a waitress with only one leg work?
121. How does a rabbi make his coffee?
122. What does a house wear?
123. I got my daughter a fridge for her birthday.
124. You heard the rumor going around about butter?
125. The first rule of the Alzheimer’s club is?
126. I poured root beer in a square glass.
127. How does NASA organize a party?
128. Why aren’t koalas actual bears?
129. How many tickles does it take to get an octopus to laugh?
130. Rest in peace to boiling water.
131. Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?
132. What do you call a rooster staring at a pile of lettuce?
133. What gets wetter the more it dries?
134. Why did the nurse need a red pen at work?
135. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?
136. The numbers 19 and 20 got into a fight.
137. Where should you go in the room if you’re feeling cold?
138. Why did it get so hot in the baseball stadium after the game?
139. What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle?
140. What do you call a train carrying bubblegum?
141. Do you know why you never see elephants hiding up in trees?
142. Why did the math textbook visit the guidance counselor?
143. As a scarecrow, people say I’m outstanding in my field.
144. Why can’t male ants sink?
145. Want to hear a construction joke?
146. Talk is cheap?
147. Two artists had an art contest.
148. I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage.
149. I have a fear of speed bumps.
150. What did one traffic light say to the other?
151. Why was six afraid of seven?
152. What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t come back?
153. Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
154. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
155. What did the duck say when it bought some lipstick?
156. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
157. What do you call malware on a Kindle?
158. Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized?
159. I started a new job as a tailor last week.
160. What kind of shoes does a spy wear?
161. Why doesn’t the sun go to college?
162. My wife accused me the other day of being too immature.
163. Why are skeletons so calm?
164. Someone stole my mood ring yesterday.
165. Why does a chicken coop only have two doors?
166. Why did the giraffe get such bad grades?
167. Why is England the wettest country?
168. Because so many kings and queens have been reigning there.
169. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
170. What are shark’s two most favorite words?
171. What do you call a religious person who sleepwalks?
172. Can February march?
173. What washes up on very small beaches?
174. Where does the sheep get his hair cut?
175. What did one elevator say to the other?
176. Why are ghosts such bad liars?
177. What do you call a belt with a watch on it?
178. Why did the tomato turn red?
179. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
180. Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn?
