After a long tiresome day of work, we all deserve to go to bed with a big smile. But did you know your last words towards bedtime can either make or ruin the remaining part of the night? Sharing sleep jokes will calm your soul and ensure a good rest.
Since we all love a peaceful night full of sweet dreams, here is a collection of funny goodnight jokes and puns to say to your family and friend before bedtime.
Funnies Goodnight Jokes and Puns
Remember, saying goodnight is not only a way to end your day but also a way of showing your loved ones they are still in your thoughts. Just don’t sleep off these jokes!
1. The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep!
2. I’m afraid to sleep alone, buddy. Could you sing a lullaby for me?
3. Good night and sleep well!
4. Dear friend, as your sole well-wisher, I want to inform you that you’re gonna regret playing games all night so much tomorrow.
5. The sun is red, the sky is blue, I cannot stay happy without disturbing you.
6. Hey you, don’t hit the ‘Next episode’ button on Netflix anymore and give your eyes some rest!
7. Good night! Please don’t show up in my dream;
8. Dear friend, I absolutely refuse to listen to your ranting about your lack of sleep tomorrow so don’t be annoying and sleep on time!
9. Now 4.7 million people are going to sleep, 2.5 million are dreaming, 1.3 million are watching TV.
10. Buddy, you better go to sleep, or I’ll tattle that you stayed up all night watching Netflix if you’re late for class tomorrow.
11. Don’t waste thinking about your lost past, Don’t waste time planning your future.
12. You are my best friend but I’m not going to stay up listening to you rant about,
13. Good night my darling, if you see a nightmare tonight, do not call me. I need to sleep.
14. Sleeping is the only thing you’re good at besides breathing,
15. Twinkle, twinkle little star. How do I wonder where you are? Up above the sky so high, where you are, I wish you were mine. Twinkle, twinkle little star. Can I keep you near or far?
16. May tomorrow be finally the day you win at life.
17. Saying good night is not a formality or due to a free message.
18. Good night!
19. Sleeping on my keyboard.
20. Good night sweetheart! Don’t look at the window at night. Also, don’t look under the bed.
21. Sun wouldn’t be red, Sea wouldn’t be blue,
22. If you feel lonely don’t worry.
23. As the thief was leaving the house, the child woke up and said to the thief,
24. When I say GOOD night, I actually want you to be a GOOD boy at night. So don’t think about any girl except God made me an SMS to reach you in Seconds.
25. Snuggle in tight and wait for me.
26. The quietness of this beautiful night reminds me of you.
27. Sending you my bed to let you rest, pillows to comfort you, and my blanket to keep you warm.
28. Have a good night.
29. Sleep in peace tonight,
30. You’ve seen enough of the cruel world
31. People sleep peaceably in their beds at night
32. Let the most beautiful dream come to you tonight.
33. The bed bugs are gone and the boogeyman has gone away.
34. The only way I can guarantee you a sweet dream is by dreaming about me. So, what are you waiting for? Sleep tight!
35. Do you think Jeff Bezos sleeps naked? Or with pajamazon?
36. Send me a text if a nightmare kicks in and you cannot sleep at night.
37. Woke up the other day with a puzzled look on my face.
38. Nothing can take your valuable place in my life except a good night’s sleep.
39. Why do dragons often sleep during the day?
40. Thinking about your mode activated! Missing you in progress!
41. Why do clowns wear loud socks?
42. Good night. Do not feel lonely while going to sleep tonight.
43. What dinosaur makes the most noise when he is asleep?
44. I am so good at sleeping.
45. Good night, and drool well.
46. Taller people sleep,
47. The good people sleep much better at night than the bad people.
48. Why do keyboards never sleep?
49. Do you know why we close our eyes? When we pray, when we cry, when we dream?
50. Scientists have finally discovered exactly how much sleep a human needs.
51. Welcome to Sweet Dreams airlines.
52. If there is a king and queen-size mattress, where does the prince sleep?
53. ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ123456789*# Thank God all the keypads are ok…
54. I couldn’t figure out why I haven’t been sleeping all night.
55. I would message you good night but it’s not a good night yet because if it was a good night,
56. What do you call making up for lost sleep?
57. I’m awake, so you should talk to me;
58. I would love to be paid to sleep.
59. Baby, you must be tired from looking so handsome all day,
60. What does the gingerbread man sleep on?
61. Darling, you must sleep early and get up on time so the sun doesn’t shine brighter than you!
62. The urge to sing “The Lion Sleeps Tonight” is just
63. Text me if you have a nightmare,
64. A sumo wrestler once came to visit and ended up sleeping on my couch for a month.
65. The night seems to be pretty boring so let’s have a date!
66. What do you call a sleeping cow?
67. Hey handsome, even though I’m the prettier one in our relationship,
68. If you notice cows sleeping in a field,
69. Babe, if you don’t go to bed right now, no hugs for you tomorrow!
70. What do you call it when a kid is fighting going to sleep?
71. I love you very much, but that doesn’t mean I will stay up all night just to talk to you.
72. Just bought a sleeping bag for $30.
73. Hi babe, I’m talking to you, well just wanted to say goodnight and I love you, do not cuddle the pillows,
74. Where do books sleep?
75. Sleep tight without worry, my love.
76. My little cousin was showing off that he sleeps in a race car bed.
77. Hey babe, you’re the prettiest girl in the world in my eyes but I don’t want you to get dark circles around your eyes!
78. I like to sleep with a bedside lamp on.
79. I don’t know why,
80. My angel, your cold empty bed is whining loudly because the pillows cannot fall asleep without you.
81. The patient said to the anesthesiologist,
83. Thinking about me all day must be pretty tiring for you,
84. I know someone who was habitually late until his doctor recommended sleeping in a herb garden.
85. Good night to you, sweetheart!
86. Chuck Norris sleeps with the light on.
87. Only thing that is more important to me is my sleep,
88. What did they call Susan B. Anthony when she was sleeping on the job?
89. Baby, I can hear your mind exploding with stress from here,
90. I’m so tired,
91. Sleepy text from a sleepy boyfriend to a sleepy girlfriend at a sleepy time on a sleepy day,
92. There was a kidnapping at school today.
93. Feel free to let your toes peek out from under the covers. No boogeyman will dare to come out with me right beside you. Bed bugs?
94. Buddy, days are for working, eating, and enjoying yourselves while nights are specifically for resting purposes. So rest yourself and sleep early!
95. How are you supposed to visit me in my dreamland if you don’t sleep?
96. I’m afraid to sleep alone, buddy.
97. Where do fish sleep?
98. What’s the point of sleeping and dreaming
99. What’s it called when your feet go to sleep and won’t wake up?
100. Buddy, days are for working, eating, and enjoying yourselves while nights are specifically for resting purposes. So rest yourself and sleep early!
101. Why did the meatballs tell the spaghetti to close its eyes and go to sleep?
102. I blame you for my difficulty sleeping.
103. Why did mom always tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
104. My friend, I don’t want you to fall asleep during class tomorrow so call it a day and go to sleep!
105. What did the mommy broom say to the baby broom?
106. Do you have a bad bed?
107. Why did the little girl take her bike to bed?
108. Is your iPad making you fall asleep?
109. Why did the little boy hide sugar under his pillow at night?
110. Learning to sleep upside down is often hard for baby bats.
111. Where do burgers sleep?
112. The male pig puts everyone to sleep.
113. Did you hear about the lady who always goes to sleep on a chandelier?
114. My partner asked why I put a watch on the bed before going to sleep.
115. When you dream in color,
116. What do you get when you eat cookies in bed?
117. I went to a gig last night and the band’s guitarist passed out on stage.
118. How did the sheep get to sleep?
119. I accidentally went to bed with my contact lenses last night. My dreams have never been clearer.
120. Sleeping comes so naturally to me.
121. I have a condition that makes me eat when I can’t sleep.
122. A man stands up to give a toast at his best friend’s wedding
123. As I was telling my grandfather goodnight over the phone, he proceeded to tell me “the height of conceit.”
124. How do cops say goodnight to their kids?
125. How do socks reproduce?
126. What one word really makes a woman open up and want to talk about everything on their mind?
127. What’s worse than a whale with a sore tooth?
128. Tucks in shirt*
129. I don’t know what all the fuss is about the helium shortage…
130. “Dad, can we go to a haunted house?”
Dad: What’s wrong with the one we live in?
131. What do you get when you cross a muppet with the Loch Ness monster?
132. My wife says I have a problem with alcohol abuse.
133. I finally got eight hours of sleep.
134. I think my cellmate is gay…
135. What does James Bond do before he goes to sleep?
136. How many astronauts have probed Uranus?
137. To bears, people in sleeping bags are?
138. I’ve never actually been caught smoking bhang.
139. Have you heard about those new corduroy pillowcases?
140. My wife can’t wrestle..
141. Fighting Couple
142. Sleep is for the weak
143. What’s a shark’s least favorite name?
144. So I have my Alexa set up to tell me a joke when I say goodnight. Last night it told me that joke…and I can’t work it out?!
145. Am I being stupid and missing something obvious?
146. What is an old person’s favorite flavor of gum?
147. Why did Satan cross the road?
148. A guy and a girl are set up on a blind date…… despite some apprehension they both hit it off and agree to a second date.
149. Present tense of cloud?’
150. They say if you do what you love, you’ll never work a day in your life…
151. Throughout the day you were in my thoughts,
152. May the darkness of the night fill your dreams! Sleep tight and good night!
153. Don’t accept cheap good night messages, only receive messages from the original and authorized dealer for good night wishes.
154. I don’t have the energy to talk; this text is more than enough.
155. For you to have a sweet dream all you have to do is,
156. This message is full of hugs and kisses.
157. I wish I could be the stars. I would watch over you as you sleep.
158. Night is a time to rest and relax. Do not spend time thinking about tomorrow!
159. I just had a nightmare, I saw you being kidnapped, I chased the kidnappers but could not get hold of them.
160. Do not sleep so tight until you can’t hear.
161. May you have the best dream ever, and let the person you love most come into your dreams,
162. I think my night will be longer than usual, therefore saying my good morning in advance,
163. The darker the night, the sweeter the dreams!
164. Don’t fall asleep if you want to keep your dreams awake.
165. What do you call a snoozing dinosaur?
166. Sleeping eight hours is not healthy for you,
167. What’s the sleepiest food?
168. What do scuba divers always wear in bed?
169. What did Bruce Wayne’s Mum hang over his bed?
170. What do you call a snoozing dinosaur sleepy friend?
171. What do you call a sleeping woodcutter?
172. Why did the nurse tiptoe past the medicine cupboard?
173. How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?
174. Which bit of art equipment makes you tired?
175. Why did the man keep running around his bed?
176. What do you call a really sleepy egg?
177. What do you get when you cross a rooster with a duck?
178. How is it possible to go without sleep for seven days and not be tired?
179. What should you do if you find a dinosaur sleeping in your bed?
180. Why did the little boy take a ruler to bed with him?
181. Which part of the car is the sleepiest?
182. Which animal sleeps with its shoes on?
183. Why do worms hate getting up in the morning?
184. What’s another word for a sleeping bag?
185. I got paid for being part of a study at a sleep clinic last night…
186. What does a Mummy cow read to a baby cow before bed?
187. Did you hear about the parents who called their baby ‘coffee?’
188. “Doctor, I can’t get to sleep at night.”
189. Did you hear about the little girl who was sent to prison for not going to sleep last night?
190. Did you hear about the girl who was dreaming that she was eating a giant marshmallow?
191. I was offered a day job at a mattress factory,
192. ““Doctor, how can I stop my sleepwalking?”
193. Did you hear about the man who kept hearing a mouse squeaking at night?
194. Did you hear about the boy who slept with his head underneath his pillow?