The majestic horses are renowned for their loyalty, intelligence, courageousness, and symbol of strength. It is for these reasons and many others that ranchers keep horses in their homes. But did you know these social friends can also be hysterical?
We have compiled a haylarious list of horse puns; pony puns, horse one-liners, polo puns, and stable puns just for you. If you are a true animal joke freak, these horse puns will be your new favorite!
Best Horse Jokes and Puns
We guarantee our horse jokes will be your mane-stays in your joke bucket. Are you ready to bray with laughter that will get you neighing and whinnying as you cringe? Be careful not to laugh so hard as you may end up hoarse.
Let’s jump into a pool of horse puns and jokes!
1. My horse is extremely spontaneous as he always does things
2. I had a half-horse friend who always had to be at
3. The only American Football team that every horse supports is?
4. The arrested horse was released by the police because
5. The bad horse didn’t want to answer any question that was asked to him,
6. Horses are extremely fond of playing indoor games.
7. Jockeys are often considered to be clouds as they hold the reins!
8. The white horse decided to run away from his own wedding.
9. A couple of horses decided to form a band called ‘The Foals’.
10. Princess Elsa never really feared any horses.
11. When the little horse stayed up late at night, his father shouted at him,
12. One of the most difficult jobs is to talk with a racehorse.
13. My brother woke up late and was running late for work,
14. The pony was a good journalist
15. I saw my brother riding uncomfortably on a tall horse.
16. If a horse is asked to cast his vote for the Senate of the horses,
17. The little pony didn’t win the singing competition
18. My brother applied as an assistant stable caretaker.
19. The stallion was an avid adventurer and has visited many places across the world.
20. If your horses get possessed by demons,
21. My neighbor has a horse who always neighs loudly at night.
22. I was riding my horse whose ropes were painted with every color.
23. The horse owner was always seen standing behind his horse.
24. We had a government-employed doctor in our area who was half horse and half man.
25. The fanciest horse which never takes part in a race is:
26. What did the mare tell her filly after dinner?
27. I once got in a bit of trouble and decided to ask my horse for advice.
28. What did the horse say when it fell?
29. Horses are exceptional lawyers as they
30. Why should you never be rude to a jump jockey?
31. The only horse which will never lose a bet is?
32. Where do horses go when they’re sick?
33. A lion decided to become a horse.
34. Why did the boy stand behind the horse?
35. The newly married horses were looking for a place to stay.
36. What’s the difference between a horse and the weather?
37. The man who owned the riding school was in dire straits
38. A horse walks into a bar, and the barman confuses idioms with jokes.
39. A horse that has a negative attitude in life can always be seen saying
40. Which side of a horse has more hair?
41. Before an important race, the champion horse prefers eating bread.
42. How did the cowboy ride into town on Friday, stay for three days, and ride out on Friday?
43. A horse walked into a restaurant, and before he could order,
44. Why are most horses in shape?
45. What did the Italian horse say when he heard there was a speed between trot and gallop?
46. Did you hear about the horse with a negative attitude?
47. What’s another term for a horse haircut?
48. What do you call a noisy horse?
49. How do you greet the horse living next door?
50. What sickness do horses hate the most?
51. Why do horses queue up so badly?
52. What do you call a horse wearing Venetian blinds?
53. What did the mother horse say to the foal who stayed up too late?
54. What kind of bread does a horse eat?
55. Why don’t horses like being promoted?
56. What do you call a well-balanced horse?
57. How did the horse with the speech impediment feel after corrective surgery went wrong?
58. What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse’s mouth?
59. Why did the horses always miss the support acts at gigs?
60. What’s black and white and eats like a horse?
61. Why did the foal go to the doctors?
62. A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says,
63. Why did the horse get an award?
64. How long should a racehorse’s legs be?
65. When does a horse get depressed by the weather?
66. How does a cowboy get a stallion to do odd jobs around the ranch?
67. I bought a horse at the spur of the moment.
68. Why do horses fart when they buck?
69. Why did the horse eat with its mouth open?
70. Our neighbor has a horse named Mayo, and well,
71. What type of computer does a horse like to eat?
72. I read a novel that had the story of a runaway horse.
73. Where do horses shop?
74. Before the much-anticipated race, my jockey was very anxious.
75. Why did the horse cross the road?
76. Horses are extremely independent animals,
77. What type of horses only go out at night?
78. During winter, my horse developed a sore throat.
79. What do horses eat?
80. A horse in the jungle lost all his clothes and ran around to find some.
81. What do you call a horse with money in the bank?
82. During winter, my horse developed a sore throat.
83. Why did the man stand behind the horse?
84. Horses that participate in races have special diets.
85. Horses love rock music, and they adore the band Queen.
86. What does a horse buy from a bakery?
87. Jockeys communicate with their horses by
88. What do you give a horse with a sore throat?
89. The arrogant horse was picked on by the other animals of the farm
90. What is the difference between a horse and a duck?
91. A Bronco went to a shop to buy a packet of juice,
92. What is a horse’s favorite TV show?
93. In the race, I bet my money on a Himalayan horse.
94. When does a horse talk?
95. My horse woke up screaming and crying in the dead of night.
96. Why could the pony gallop really fast?
97. The horse, while climbing a mountain, fell down and said to his friend,
98. How do you calm down an impatient jockey?
99. The little horse was scolded by his teacher as
100. The anthem for horses is ‘Watch me whip…
101. A horse won the horse racing competition at school and became quite popular overnight.
102. Just before any thunder, horses see lightning colts!
103. A horse was running towards a man at full speed
104. My friend had a horse who was racing in the coming week.
105. There was a joust,
106. A little horse borrowed some money from his big brother and couldn’t pay him back for quite a while.
107. At a game of poker, the horse kept on losing but won the game in the last round.
108. My horse is a bad dancer because,
109. The horse stalls at the racetrack were labeled F, E, D, B, and A.
110. The teacher horse who specialized in teaching philosophy displayed a glass half-filled with water and asked his students,
111. One should never insult any jockey.
112. The young horse was ambitious to join the top colleges of the country.
113. Horses only ever have one hospital where they can go to have babies.
114. After visiting the bathroom,
115. I finally scolded my horse a lot because it ate all of the bedding in its stable,
116. Horses usually carry their lunches to work wrapped in
117. Horses are very bad at boxing as they just keep on,
118. Horses only ever go to one place to cut and get their hair done.
119. My neighbor has a horse that has explosive pace.
120. Horses are avid readers of books by J.K. Rowling.
121. Ponies are wonderful hosts as they have
122. The only cheese that can completely disguise a small horse is?
123. Just before the race,
124. The horse was shown the red card and asked to leave the field while playing soccer
125. The little mare got very sick,
126. The amateur artist displayed a lot of horse paintings and drawings
127. I recently bought a painting from a farmer who only draws pictures of horses and cows.
128. In a race, a horse named ‘Black Beauty’ beat the odds to win the race.
129. The horse had no friends
130. I read a novel that had the story of a runaway horse.
131. The arrogant horse was picked on by the other animals of the farm
132. A couple of horses decided to form a band called ‘The Foals’.
133. My brother woke up late and was running late for work,
134. In a game of poker, the horse kept on losing but won the game in the last round.
135. I saw my brother riding uncomfortably on a tall horse.
136. A horse walked into a restaurant, and before he could order, the waiter said,
137. Horses are very bad at boxing
138. We had a government-employed doctor in our area who was half horse and half man.
139. I had this recurring dream that I had become a horse since last week. I had it tonight too.
140. I once got in a bit of trouble and decided to ask my horse for advice.
141. Horses love rock music, and they adore the band Queen.
142. The young pony was wildly excited about being called up to the sports rally
143. After saving up his salary, the horse decided to buy the car he dreamt of.
144. Just before the final race, one horse wanted to quit,
145. The only degree that a horse achieves after completing college is?
146. Horses usually travel via inter-galloptic space
147. When the Jedi Knight was to embark on a long adventure, his horse wished him,
148. The stylish horse’s hair always shines brightly in the sun
149. It was easy to understand why the horse went so lame early,
150. As soon as the horse ate the entire room of hay,
151. Everyone loved the new stable boy
152. The kids loved watching the parade of horses
153. The mother pony was always yelling at her two little ones
154. She names her pony Storm,
155. When you hear some gossip from a horse you are basically listening to?
156. The younger horses must have a stable environment,
157. The farmhand had to get rid of his horse,
158. A horse was fired as a weather reporter
159. Horses make great pets for kids
160. If you want to buy a thoroughbred horse,
161. A little pony wanted to sleep with his mother and father
162. Everyone loves the horses of the farm
163. Most horses will only eat their sandwiches
164. The horse left the farm
165. When the horse walked into the hospital,
166. Did you know,
167. The horse was not popular with her friends anymore
168. The fastest way to mail a little horse to your friend is by Pony Express.
169. Vampires like to go to horse races,
170. A racehorse will not wear underwear
171. Cowboys ride horses,
172. Did you know that if you find a horseshoe it really means,
173. If you want to really lead a horse to water,
174. In order to determine what animals the kids liked at the farm,
175. The only thing that you should put in the mouth of a quarter horse is?
176. One reason they had to keep the horse in his stable today was because he came down with a severe case of hay fever today.
177. When a horse accidentally swallowed a dollar bill,
178. The most famous horse thieves of all time are?
179. Horse sense is the ability to?
180. The racehorse is considered to be the strongest animal,
181. The hardest thing about learning to ride a horse is?
182. The only thing as big as a horse but weighs absolutely nothing
183. Newlywed horses are invited to stay,
184. An egg and a young horse have one thing in common,
185. That shy little horse went behind the tree
186. It can be challenging to identify a horse from the back
187. Do you have a sore throat?
188. The reason that Teddy Roosevelt was mean to horses?
189. You’re such a stud.
190. You’re haylarious.
191. How does the upbeat horse look at life?
192. Cud you go on a date with me?
193. What did the horse say to end the argument?
194. What did the horse ask his owner?
195. Get off your,
196. Why did the horse cover his body?
197. I herd,
198. Why did the foal eat with its mouth open?
199. You’re my better?
200. What happens when a horse forgets its umbrella?
201. How do you make a small fortune on horse racing?
202. A horse sits down in a movie theater, and the woman next to him asks, “Excuse me… are you a horse?”
“Why yes, I am,” replies the horse.
“What are you doing at this movie?”
203. Three racehorses are staying in a stable. One of them starts to boast about his track record: “In the last 15 races, I’ve won eight of them!” Another horse breaks in: “Well, in the last 27 races, I’ve won 19!” “Oh, that’s good, but in the last 36 races, I’ve won 28!” says another.
204. Sam said to Fred, “I put £20 on a horse last week, and he came in at twenty-five to one.”
205. Meet me at the hair saloon
206. Hold your horses,
207. I’m so glad you’re: