220+ Best Duck Jokes and Puns

We waddled through the internet and came up with an eggcelent collection of clever, knee-slappers, cheesy duck jokes, and puns that everyone will quack up in no time.

Best Duck Jokes and Puns

Inspired by their round compact bodies, webbed feet, and large bills, our adorable feathered duck friends trigger unmatched humor and deserve a spotlight.

Enjoy your ride on our hilarious duck puns and jokes that will get you swimming in your giggles.

1. Donald Duck became an undercover operator and became a?



2. Why do ducks like campfires?

They love seeing them quackle at night.


3. Why did the duck get a red card in the football game?

For fowl-play.


4. What do you get if you cross a duck and Santa Claus?

A Christmas quacker.


5. What did the duck’s friend say when she won the lottery?

“You lucky duck!”


6. Two ducks were waddling down a sidewalk when, suddenly, one tripped and fell.

It got up and said to the other duck, “I’m sorry — I tripped on a quack!”


7. What’s a duck’s favorite vegetable?

An eggplant!


8. What’s a duck’s favorite taco topping?



9. Most ducks live in what state?



10. What do you call a duck that loves fireworks?

A fire-quacker.


11. What do you call a cow and two ducks?

Cheese and quackers.


12. Why are ducks bad drivers?

Their windshields are quacked.


13. What do naughty ducks lay?

Deviled eggs.


14. What is a chick’s favorite drink?



15. What do mallards eat at a baseball game?



16. What did the duck say to the corn it ate for lunch?

You taste a-maize-ing.


17. When is roast duck bad for your health?

When you’re the duck.


18. What did Detective Duck say to his partner?

“Let’s quack this case!”


19. What did the lawyer say to the duck in court?

“I demand an egg-splanation!”


20. What do pre-teen ducks hate?

When their voice quacks.


21. Why do ducks check the news?

For the feather forecast.


22. What happens when a duck flies upside down?

It quacks up.


23. What did the duck say to the banker?

“My bill is bigger than yours.”


24. Why did the duck get a second job?

He had too many bills.


25. What snacks do ducks like to eat with their cheese?



26. How do ducks talk?

They don’t; they quack.


27. There were no more clients for the duck doctor.

Everyone knew he was a quack!


28. What’s a duckling’s favorite game?



29. Did the duck couple make plans for their night out?

No, they decided to wing it.


30. What does a duck wear to a fancy event?

A ducksedo!


31. Why did the duck end up in jail?

He was selling quack.


32. What is storytime called when you read to ducklings?



33. Why do ducks lay eggs?

They would break if they dropped them.


34. Which musician do ducks listen to the most?



35. What did the duck say when he dropped the dishes?

“I hope I didn’t quack any!”


36. What do you call a duck that breaks into people’s houses?

A robber ducky!


37. What point of a view does a duck write a book in?

Bird person


38. What happens when a duck has hiccups?

It lays scrambled eggs.


39. What document did the duck politician write on his mouth?

The bill of rights.


40. What do duck physicists say?

“Quark, quark.”


41. What does a duck get at the baseball game?

Quacker jacks.


42. What did the flying golf ball yell to the mallards in the pond?



43. What is it called when a duck commits an illegal act in waterpolo?

A water-fowl!


44. Why don’t ducks make plans?

They prefer to wing it!


45. What do you call a bird that can fix anything?

Duck Tape.


46. Why do ducks say quack?

Because they can’t say moo.


47. What did the ducks carry their school books in?

Their quack-packs.


48. I pity the ducks who were pricked by the quack-tus

and had to go to the duck-tor.


49. I went searching for ducks at the pond but only found other birds. 

It was a wild goose chase.

50. Ducks love coffee; 

they love bre-wing it.


51. How did the duck parents know their duckling was a prodigy?

He was eggcellent from birth!


52. The mallards consulted 

the duck-tionary as they couldn’t get quacks.


53. What sound does the son of a chicken and a duck make?



54. I saw a baby duckling in the duck house,

I guess she was nest-ling.


55. Why was the duck put into the basketball game?

To make a fowl shot!


56. It’s always the duck-est

just before dawn.


57. What has fangs and webbed feet?

Count Duckula


58. What kind of egg does an optimistic duckling hatch from?

Sunny side up


59. Daddy duck was watching a film called

‘Lord Of The Wings’.


60. Why did the duck go to the chiropractor?

To get it back quacked.


61. The robber ducky stole the soap,

so she was arrested in a fowl case.


62. What kind of TV shows do ducks watch?



63. Ducks are such creatures.

Waddle I do without them?


64. What’s a duck’s favorite ballet?

The Nutquacker.


65. Ducks love surfing the internet;

they use their webbed feet.


66. Did you hear about the duck who thought he was a squirrel?

That was one tough nut to quack.


67. A duck had her feathers broken,

so her family doctor used duck-tape to fix her feathers.


68. Why did the duck cross the playground?

To get to the other slide.


69. The Judge of the Duck Court asked the lawyers

and the attendants to give her an egg-splanation.


70. What kind of egg does a calm and collected duckling come from?

Over easy.


71. The duck usually says, “Quack Quack,” but the duck was having hiccups, so she was saying 

“Quick-Quick” instead!


72. What do you call a cat that swallows a duck?

A duck-filled-fatty-puss.


73. A cow and two ducks were really good friends,

they were known as Milk and Quackers.


74. Where do tough ducks come from?

Hard-boiled eggs.


75. A detective duck was really suspicious about a case, so she said,

“Let’s quack this case. ”


76. Why was the teacher annoyed with the duck?

Because he wouldn’t quit quackin’ jokes.


77. Some ducklings were playing hide and seek when the baby duck said,



78. Why did the duck cross the road?

He was tied to the chicken.


79. A group of ducks planned to go out,

so they were watching the news to get the feather forecast.


80. What do ducks have with soup?



81. Two little ducks didn’t like their backpacks,

so they were told to carry their school books in their quack packs instead!


82. What do you call it when it’s raining ducks and chickens?

Fowl weather


83. The Buddhist duck visited

the mo-nest-ry every day.


84. What do you see when a duck bends over?

It’s buttquack


85. The lovely duck couple went to watch a movie,

they watched ‘A-nest-hesia.’


86. Why did the duck sleep under the car?

Because he wanted to wake up oily.


87. Why do ducks never grow up?

Because they grow down.


88. Two ducks are swimming in a pond.

One of them said “Quack quack.” The other replied, “I was about to say that!”


89. At what time does a duck wake up?

At the quack of dawn.


90. What do ducks say when people throw things at them?

“Time to duck!”


91. Why did the duck get detention?

He couldn’t stop quackin’ jokes in class.


92. The poultry owner took their ducks

to the duck-tor as they were sick.


93. Ducks fly to the south

because it’s difficult to waddle so far.


94. The duck was declared out by the umpire in a baseball match 

because she did a fowl play.


95. The poultry farm owner made his duck a famous singer 

and the duck promises to keep on singing until his Bill Withers.


96. The poultry farm owner said,

“My ducks are very sincere; they are really ho-nest.”


97. My ducks are really good at saving

because they have their bills under control.


98. All the rubber ducks were named,

but it was very difficult to distinguish them in spite of their names because they looked egg-xactly the same.


99. The rubber duck was shocked when she saw another rubber duck walking out of a beautician’s clinic and exclaimed,

“I don’t believe you got plastic surgery done.”

100. The interviewer asked everyone whether they had heard about the duck who thought she was a squirrel; they replied,

“Argh! That was a tough one to quack.”


101. If a duck was crossed with a crocodile,

it would make a quack-odile.


102. Papa Duck decided to take his family for a family holiday

in North Duck-ota.


103. The duck-tective interrogated the victim ducks today,

and they eventually quacked under pressure.


104. The duck dropped some dishes and apologized, saying,

“I’m so sorry, I hope I didn’t quack any. “


105. We fed a group of ducks in the backyard the other day, 

and it was really bread-taking


106. If a duck and an elf were crossed,

you would be getting a Christmas quacker.


107. The duck who lived on the 20th floor of the building

wanted a pair of binoculars to get a bird’s eye view.


108. A duck went out to watch a movie,

starring her favorite actress Duck-ota Johnson.


109. The duck’s favorite dance movie is ‘La La Land’, he said,

“It’s poultry in motion.”


110. In a group of back-yard duck friends,

one duck was left alone because she was said to have quack-itude.


111. A set of six rubber ducks were packed in the box,

and so they were called a box of quackers.


112. The duck slept without keeping an alarm but don’t worry,

she’ll get up at the quack of dawn.


113. Did you ever hear about the poor duck who wanted plastic surgery for his face?

He couldn’t afford the bill.


114. Daffy didn’t mind that he lost the swimming match against Bugs.

It was like water off a duck’s back.


115. A duck was scolded by the teacher as she was continuously 

quacking jokes in the class.


116. What do you call a clever duck?

A wise quacker.


117. How do you make a duck sing soul music?

Put him in a microwave until his Bill Withers.


118. Two cows were chatting over the fence between their fields.

The first cow said, “I tell you, this mad cow disease is really pretty scary. They say it’s spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm.” The other cow replied, “Hell, I ain’t worried, it won’t affect us ducks.”


119. A duck walks into a bar and says, “Give me a beer”.

The bartender asks, “How are you going to pay for that?”

The duck says, “Just put it on my bill.”


120. What do you call a duck with a drug problem?

A quackhead


121. How do you get down from an elephant?

You don’t. You get down from a duck.


122. What does a duck say when it goes to the doctor?



123. Two Scottish ducks are walking down the road when one says to the other, “Quack”.

The other replies, “I’m going as quack as I can!”


124. Why do ducks have feathers?

To cover up their butt quacks.


125. A man walks into the doctor’s office with a big white duck on his head.

The doctor looks up and says, “Yes, sir, can I help you?”

The duck says, “Yeah, can you get this guy off my butt?”


126. A platypus walks into a bar owned by a duck.

He finishes his drink and asks for his check.


127. Two ducks are swimming in the pond.

The first duck says, “Quack, quack!”

The second duck says, “That’s funny, I was just about to say that!”


128. What do you get if you put a duck in a cement mixer?

Quacks in the pavement.


129. What’s the difference between a duck?

One of the legs is both the same.


130. What’s the difference between a cranky two-year-old and a duckling?

One is a whiny toddler and the other is a tiny waddler.


131. What do ducks carry their school books in?



132. I stubbed my toe and my Mom shouted at me for yelling, “What the duck!”

She was angry that I used fowl language.


133. How do ducks make pancakes?

They use Bis-quack!


134. How do you change tires on a duck?

With a quacker jack.


135. What’s a duck’s favorite animal at the zoo?



136. Did you hear about the duck who thought it was a squirrel?

It was one tough nut to crack.


137. Why did the duck go to the bank?

She wanted to get more bills.


138. Why did the duck have to go to the auto shop?

His windscreen was quacked!


139. What did the cow tell the duck when she heard she won the lottery?

“You lucky duck!”


140. What do you call a crazy duck?

A wacky duck!


141. What do you call a crate that’s filled with a bunch of ducks?

A box of quackers!


142. Did you ever hear about the duck that got his feathers knocked off?

He couldn’t tell up from down.


143. The rest of Joey’s aviary is so well-behaved!

He just couldn’t get his ducks in a row.


144. What news did the duck get from the doctor?

He had a perfect bill of health!


145. Why was the baby duck sad?

He was feeling down.


146. I went searching for ducks at the pond but only found other birds.

It was a wild goose chase


147. There were no more clients for the duck doctor.

Everyone knew he was a quack!


148. Where do ducks go to search for jokes?

The world wide webbed feet!


149. What does a duck say when they’re sick?

They’re feeling under the feather.

150. I’ve noticed a lot of rubber waterfowl in TV shows lately.

Getting sick of all this produck placement.


151. Why do spiders like ducks so much?

Their webbed feet.


152. Did you hear about the duck that swam into sewage?

He smelled fowl.


153. What did the bird in the air yell when the bird in the water was in danger?

Hey! Duck!


154. How do ducks propose?

With a wedding wing.


155. What document did the duck politician write on his mouth?

The bill of rights.


156. What do you call slang between young ducks?



157. What kind of egg does a calm and collected duckling come from?

Over easy.


158. What do you call a kind and successful duck?

A waddle citizen


159. What do American ducks set off on the fourth of July?



160. What fabric softener do ducks use?



161. What game did the duck play at the arcade?



162. Why did the duck need his window fixed?

There was a quack in it!


163. What does a duck use to break an almond open?

A nutquacker.


164. What does a duck say when they disagree with someone?

“That’s reduckulous.”


165. Where do ducks go shopping?

The mall-ard.


166. What was the secret agent duck named?

James Pond!


167. What do you call the evil ruler of a small pond?

A ducktator!


168. One day a duck ran into his cousin from Canada

He was a bit of a loon.


169. What did the duck say as it set a monster upon its pond?

“Release the quacken!”


170. Ducks can’t carry up to four fish on their bill.

But a peli-can!


171. What does a duck shout when it’s angry?

“What the duck?”


172. The duck detective knew something was amiss the second he took the case.

He suspected fowl play.


173. What do you get when you cross a duck and a wiener dog?

A duckshund


174. What slogan did the geese use in their anti-duck propaganda?

“Quack is wack.”


175. What do you call a duck that’s biting someone?

Peking Duck!


176. What game does a duck play at the bar?



177. The duck was upset by how little his boss paid him.

He said it was a poultry sum.


178. Why don’t ducks need smartphones?

The web is already on their feet!


179. Where do ducks live?



180. What did the cow and duck name their new rock band?

Cheese and quackers!


181. What’s a duck’s favorite fantasy movie?

Lord of the Wings.


182. What do you call it when a group of mallards is making too much noise?



183. Did you hear what the delinquent duck said when his teacher told him to stop talking in class?

“Waddle you do about it?”


184. What’s the name of Mr. Duck’s favorite drummer?

Wingo Star!


185. Who was the duck’s favorite politician?


186. How do you know if a duck is scared?

He’s quacking in his boots.


187. Ducks love surfing the internet; 

they use their webbed feet.


188. You can’t get any information from Spy Duck.

He’s a tough nut to quack.


189. My ducks are really good at saving because they have their bills under control.

He’s a tough nut to quack.


190. The male duck wanted to become a rapper,

so he made all his friends call him Drake!


191. The duck’s favorite dance movie is ‘La La Land’, he said,

“It’s poultry in motion.”


192. The body-conscious duck asked if she had gained some weight and her friend said, 

“You are as light as a feather.”


193. The duck mechanic offered to fix the computer as he is quite good at

duck-nology and understands the web.


194. The drakes were in need of medication as

they had an aci-duck stomach.


195. The duck model was shooting a make-up tutorial,

she was showing viewers how to wing it.


196. The group of ducks watched a movie together,

it was called ‘Beak A Leg.’


197. At a high-profile civil suit, the duck lawyer in charge of defense said,

” Ma-llard these ducks are not at fault. “


198. A group of ducks were going to a rock band concert,

the band name was ‘Wing-er.’


199. Some drakes were really pro-duck-tive,

so a film crew decided to make duck-umentry on them.

200. Ducks are always trending on social media,

they have a large fan follo-wing.


201. The celebrity duck refused to answer the interviewer’s questions.

I guess she just ducked the question.


202. All the drakes, mallards and ducks asked the waiter to get them quack-a-mole topping added to

their nachos.


203. Donald Duck was egg-cited for the hide and seek game

as he’s a wise quacker in being sneaky.


204. Ducks are such creatures.

Waddle I do without them?


205. If a duck pilot went to McDonald’s,

he would introduce himself as Launchpad McQuack.


206. I pity the ducks who were pricked by the quack-tus 

and had to go to the duck-tor.


207. A duck who is never tired of quacking and always wants to quack is called

Quack-more Duck.


208. Knock knock.

Who’s there?


Duck who? Duck quick! My ball is heading towards you!


209. If a flower was crossed with a duck, 

we would get Daisy Duck.


210. Knock knock.

Who’s there?


Quack who? Quack open the door and you’ll see!


211. What language can a duck who converses with geese speak fluently?



212. Chicken! Duck! Pheasant plucker!

Oh, sorry — excuse my fowl language.


213. What do they say about French ducks?

They have a certain je ne sais quack about them.


214. This is ducking good!

I’m quacking up.


215.  What the duck?

Watch out for the quacks..


216. You’re quack-y.

It’s inade-quack.


217. Nice duck-xedo!

Good duck.


218. Thanks for the intro-duck-tion.

Con-duck-t yourself in a responsible manner.


219. You have a,



220. Count Duck-ula.

Meet me at the duck.


221. Nice quack-pack.

Is there a de-duck-tible?


222. Where’s the 



223. A duck that steals

is a robber duck.


224. He was in-duck-ted into 

the hall of fame.


225. Would you like to drink,



226. I’m wearing



227. That was



228. Be careful.

It’s a deli-quack.


229. In the desert, 

you can find a quack-tus.




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